60 Mint Puns That Are Worth a Mint-ion Laughs

Mint is the most aggressive herb in existence. I planted some in my garden three years ago and it’s basically staged a hostile takeover of every raised bed I own. It’s in the strawberries now. It’s under the pavers. I’m pretty sure it’s plotting to get into the house. Anyway, I have a lot of feelings about mint, and apparently the best way to process those feelings is through puns.

1. The Classic

We were mint to be together.

I know, I know. You’ve seen it on every couple’s Instagram since 2014. But it’s the foundation. The load-bearing wall of mint puns. You gotta respect the OG.

2. Condition Report

My car has 230,000 miles on it, a mysterious rattle in the dashboard, and one window that only goes down, never up. But I keep a pack of Tic Tacs in the cupholder, so technically it’s in mint condition.

3.

Why did the herb garden start a bank? It was already making a mint.

4. The -ment Gauntlet (Round 1)

Okay, here’s where I’m gonna be honest with you. The word “mint” lives inside approximately 400 English words that end in “-ment,” and I’m not strong enough to resist any of them. Let’s get a few out of the way:

• It takes real commit-mint to grow your own herbs.
• My best invest-mint? A window box and some potting soil.
• There’s always room for improve-mint in the garden.

5.

Did you make the pay-mint on thyme? Because I’m running out of both.

6.

“What’s your senti-mint on mojitos?”
“Strongly in favor. Aggressively in favor.”

7. One I’m Actually Proud Of

So menthol, the compound that makes mint feel cold on your tongue, actually tricks your TRPM8 receptors into thinking the temperature dropped. Which means mint is literally gaslighting your mouth. Every. Single. Time. Mint is the most manipulative plant on earth and we just let it into our toothpaste like it’s fine.

Anyway: I told my dentist I was worried about the chemicals in my toothpaste and he said don’t worry, it’s just a cool ele-mint.

8.

That’s a mint-eresting idea!

(This one is a stretch and I don’t care. Moving on.)

9.

What do you call a nervous herb? One that’s having a mint-al breakdown.

10. Instagram-Ready

Caption this selfie with your mojito: “Current mood: fresh to death.” No wait, “Livin’ my best leaf.” No wait, just go with “unbeleafably mint.” That’s the one. Screenshot it.

11.

Please don’t mint-errupt me, I’m on a roll.

12.

I tried to start a conversation about herbs and my friend said “don’t even mint-ion it.”

13. A Tangent About Mint Juleps

I went to a Kentucky Derby party once where the host made mint juleps with dried mint from a spice jar. Like the McCormick kind. From 2019. I’m not saying it ruined the party but I am saying I still think about it when I can’t sleep. Some things you don’t recover from.

14.

We finally reached an agree-mint: spearmint is superior to peppermint in every culinary application and I will not be taking questions.

15.

Why did the mint go to therapy? It had too many attach-mints.

Yeah, that one’s bad. I’m leaving it in because I already typed it and the backspace key is far away.

16. The -ment Gauntlet (Round 2)

• The ship-mint of fresh mint arrived late. Ironic.
• Winning the herb competition was a great achieve-mint.
• This is a well-known establish-mint, they’ve been growing mint since 1987.

17.

The govern-mint passed a new law requiring fresh herbs in every kitchen.

I’d vote for that platform tbh.

18.

Let’s try an experi-mint and see what happens when you plant mint next to basil. (What happens is the mint wins. The mint always wins.)

19. Niche Alert

Mentha pulegium, that’s pennyroyal mint, was used in ancient Rome as a flea repellent. Pliny the Elder wrote about it. So if someone asks you what the most historically significant mint is, you can confidently say it’s the one that’s been fighting bugs since before the fall of the Roman Empire.

Pennyroyal for your thoughts?

GET IT? Like “penny for your, ” okay you get it. I’m genuinely proud of that one even though nobody will ever use it in conversation.

20.

Just a mo-mint, please, I need to catch my breath.

21.

Which de-part-mint do you work in? Herb-an development.

(That’s a double pun. I don’t make the rules. Actually I do make the rules, this is my blog.)

22.

We need some re-fresh-mint after that long walk.

23. Text You’d Send Your Friend at 11pm

“hey do you think altoids are just breath mints or a whole lifestyle because I just ate an entire tin and I can see sounds”

24.

I found a frag-mint of the old herb pot in the garden. RIP to a legend.

25.

My doctor said I should take a vitamin supple-mint. I asked if mint chocolate chip ice cream counts. She said no. I disagree.

26.

Please sign this docu-mint confirming you understand that once planted, mint cannot be stopped.

27. One That Barely Qualifies

He plays a musical instru-mint.

A recorder, specifically. Because recorders, like mint, are things you can never fully get rid of once a child brings one into your house. This pun is terrible but the comparison is airtight.

28.

They had a heated argu-mint about whether chocolate mint is an abomination or a gift from God. (It’s a gift from God. Fight me.)

29. This Is Important

Fun fact: there are over 600 varieties of mint in the Mentha genus. Six hundred. That’s not a plant family, that’s a mint-erdisciplinary study. Botanists are out here just discovering new mints like it’s Pokémon.

30.

That’s a mint-eresting develop-mint in the case, detective.

31.

How do you mint-eract with your team? With fresh ideas, obviously.

32.

Turn left at the next mint-ersection.

I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. These inter→minter swaps are getting out of hand and I can’t stop.

33.

The mint-erior design of this café is stunning, lots of green, obviously.

34. For the Film Nerds

The movie Mint-erstellar was amazing. Matthew McConaughey travels through a wormhole and discovers that the fifth dimension is just an infinite IKEA full of potted herbs. “Murph! Don’t let me leaf, Murph!”

Okay I added some creative liberties to the plot there.

35.

What did the mint say when it was accused of being invasive? “Don’t mint-erfere with my plans.”

36.

I’d like to com-mint on that but honestly I’m running out of ways to make this format feel fresh.

37. Rapid Fire, No Apologies

• Is that a new job require-mint?
• We need an a-mint-ment to the rules.
• This is an important seg-mint of the show.
• The detective will mint-errogate the suspect.

There. Four puns. No commentary. Like ripping off a Band-Aid.

38.

Confession: I once killed a mint plant. I know that sounds impossible because mint is basically the cockroach of the herb world, but I did it. Overwatered it in a pot with no drainage. My one superpower is finding new ways to fail at things that are supposed to be foolproof.

39. Another Niche One

Eau de cologne was originally formulated in the 18th century with a bunch of citrus oils and, you guessed it, mint. So every guy who douses himself in cologne at the gym is technically an herbalist.

That’s not really a pun, that’s just a fact I wanted to share. Here’s the pun: he thought his cologne was scent-sational but it was really just a bunch of non-scents.

Wait, that’s not even a mint pun. I’m losing the thread. Let me refocus.

40.

Spear-mint of the moment decision.

41.

Why did the mint leaf go to school? For enrich-mint.

42. The Genuinely Clever One (I Think)

Mint propagates through runners, underground stems called stolons that shoot out horizontally and pop up new plants everywhere. It’s basically networking. LinkedIn, but in dirt.

So: What do you call a mint plant’s professional strategy? Stol-on networking.

If you got that one, we’re friends now. If you didn’t, I respect you for scrolling past it.

43.

“I told my roommate I was growing mint on the balcony.”
“She said, ‘Isn’t that a slippery slope?'”
“I said, ‘No, that’s the peppermint oil I spilled on the stairs.'”

44.

Here’s a mint-erim report: we’re about two-thirds through this list and I’m holding up fine. Mentally. Physically my fingers are tired.

45. Caption-Ready

That’s none of your spear-business.

Use it. Don’t credit me. Just send it.

46.

The police tried to mint-ercept the package but it was just someone’s Etsy order for dried peppermint. False alarm.

47.

An exclamation mark is a mint-erjection! (See what I did there? With the exclamation mark? Because it’s, yeah, you got it.)

48. Okay This One Is Pure Garbage

All systems are mint-erconnected.

I have nothing to add. It’s just the word “interconnected” with mint in it. I’m not even going to dress it up. Sometimes you just gotta fill a list, you know?

49.

Why did the mint start a podcast? It wanted a bigger plat-form. And by plat-form I mean, okay that’s a plant pun, not a mint pun. I’m losing it. Let me try again.

Why did the mint start a podcast? It had a lot to say and zero commit-mint to brevity.

50. The Big 5-0

Fifty puns in. We’re driving on the mint-erstate highway now, folks. No exits for another ten.

51.

How do you mint-erpret this data? It clearly shows that people who like mint chocolate chip are 47% cooler than everyone else. Peer-reviewed study. (By me. I’m the peer.)

52.

I asked my garden for its opinion and it gave me a very strong mint-erpretation of the situation: grow everywhere, ask forgiveness never.

53. Obscure Mint Fact Into Pun Pipeline

The U.S. Mint, the actual place where they make coins, was the first federal building erected under the Constitution in 1792. It predates the White House. So technically, America decided money was more important than having a president’s house, which… tracks.

What do you get when you cross a coin factory with an herb garden? A place that really makes cents. And scents.

Double wordplay. Ngl that might be the peak of this whole post.

54.

Star Wars is a mint-ergalactic saga and Yoda definitely smells like eucalyptus and spearmint. You can’t convince me otherwise.

55.

We need to mint-erchange ideas more often. Specifically about mojito recipes.

56.

“Hey, can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“Do you think I use too many mint puns?”
“I don’t think that’s really relev-mint.”

57. Send This to Someone You Love

You’re one in a million. Scratch that, you’re one in a mint-ion.

58.

This is an mint-errogative question: why do we put mint in toothpaste but not in, like, hand soap? Who decided mouth-fresh was okay but hand-fresh was weird? I want answers and I want them delivered in pun format.

59. Second to Last and Feeling It

Kinda wild that the same plant flavors both lamb sauce and Girl Scout Thin Mints. Mint’s range is honestly unmatched. It’s the Meryl Streep of herbs. I should put that on a t-shirt.

What did the Thin Mint say to the lamb chop? “We have the same agent.”

60.

I’ve been writing about mint for so long that the word has lost all meaning. It’s just four letters now. M-I-N-T. Is it even real? Was it ever?

Anyway. Thanks for sticking around. If you need me, I’ll be in the garden, trying to negotiate a peace treaty with the spearmint that’s colonized my tomato bed. Current senti-mint: defeated but minty fresh.