61 Marvel Puns That Are Truly Loki Hilarious

Marvel puns are the one thing I never get tired of making, even when they’re bad. Especially when they’re bad. I’ve been collecting these like Infinity Stones for months now, and honestly some of them are so awful that I think Thanos would snap them out of existence if he could. But here we are.

1. The Obvious Opener

I’m feeling a bit iron-ic today, I’ve got all this heavy metal energy but nowhere to fly.

2. Stark Reality

Don’t go getting Stark-raving mad at me for these puns. We’re just getting started and I can already feel some of you closing the tab.

3.

He’s a Cap-able leader.

That’s it. That’s the pun. Sometimes simple is best.

4. The Shield Trilogy

• That’s a shield-y move and you know it.
• Steve Rogers never cuts corners, he prefers to throw them.
• Captain America’s GPS must be broken because he always goes the right way. (Get it? Like… politically? Okay never mind.)

5.

I’m Thor-oughly impressed by your strength.

6.

Why did Thor sit on the story of the Rainbow Bridge? He wanted to get to the Bifrost of the issue.

I’m not proud of that one. I’m genuinely not. But I typed it and now you have to live with it too.

7. My Personal Favorite

My friend asked me what I thought about the God of Thunder’s fashion sense. I said, “Honestly? He really knows how to hammer out a look.” She threw a pillow at me. Worth it.

8.

Don’t take my kindness for Asgard-ed.

9.

You’re Mjolnir-ly there!

This one’s a stretch. I know it’s a stretch. You know it’s a stretch. It barely works phonetically and I had to squint at it for like four minutes before I decided to include it anyway. Moving on.

10. Hulk Cluster

• Don’t make me Hulk out.
• He’s having a smash-ing good time.
• Feeling a bit green with envy over those muscles.

Banner puns are weirdly easy to make. The character is basically a walking punchline setup, he’s green, he’s angry, he smashes things. It’s pun paradise.

11.

What’s the Hulk’s favorite type of music? Heavy smash metal.

12.

She’s a black belt in espionage.

13. The Web We Weave

I told my coworker not to get caught in Natasha’s web of lies. He said, “Wrong spider franchise.” Fair point, but also, no, Black Widow is literally a spider. I will die on this hill.

14.

Hawkeye’s got a sharp eye for detail. Also a sharp arrow for your chest cavity. Depends on the day, really.

15.

Why did Clint Barton become an archer? Because he always wanted to make his point.

16.

I Loki can’t believe you fell for that trick.

Instagram caption material right there. You’re welcome.

17. God of Mischief, King of Puns

What’s Loki’s favorite type of key? A low-key one. I know, I KNOW. But this is genuinely one of those puns that lives rent-free in my brain and I’m not sorry about it. Every single time someone says “low-key” in conversation I have to physically restrain myself from making this joke. My friends are tired. I am not.

18.

Loki’s plans are always full of mischief managed.

(Yes I just crossed Marvel and Harry Potter. The internet police can come find me.)

19.

That villain has a real Thanos-hold on the situation.

20. The Snap Heard Round the World

Why doesn’t Thanos use social media? He prefers to snap in person.

21.

Thanos’s plan was perfectly balancedas all things should be. That’s not even a pun, that’s just a quote. But it functions as a pun in the right context and I’m counting it.

22.

The Infinity Gauntlet really gives you a handful of problems.

23.

I tried to collect all six Infinity Stones but the cost was more than I could soul-der.

Two puns in one sentence. Greedy? Maybe. Effective? Debatable.

24. Spider-Man Section (Finally)

Peter Parker’s photography career really has him caught in a web of professional obligations.

25.

Why is Spider-Man so good at school? He’s always on the web doing research.

Okay I’m already running out of spider wordplay that doesn’t overlap with the Black Widow ones. This is the problem with having two spider-themed characters.

26.

Spider-Man’s favorite day of the week? Webnesday.

I hate this one. I genuinely hate it. But my twelve-year-old nephew texted it to me and I promised him I’d put it in.

27.

“Hey, you going to the Marvel marathon tonight?”
“I MayParker.”

28. The One I’m Most Proud Of

Doctor Strange doesn’t do well at poker. He always shows his hand, but to be fair, he’s used to dealing with multiple dimensions at once and has trouble focusing on just one suit.

A poker pun that works on three levels? In THIS economy? Yeah, I’m gonna brag about this one for a while.

29.

Why did Doctor Strange fail his driving test? He kept making wrong turns in the multiverse.

30.

The Sorcerer Supreme really knows how to spell things out for you.

31.

Wong doesn’t get enough credit. He’s never Wong. Okay that’s terrible. Sorry, Benedict Wong, you deserve better than this.

Side note, can we talk about how underused Wong is? The man held a portal open for like the entire final battle of Endgame and his reward was becoming Sorcerer Supreme basically off-screen. Anyway. Back to puns.

32. Wakanda Forever, Puns Forever

What do you say when someone asks if you’ve been to Wakanda? “Wakanda question is that?”

This is top-tier text-your-friend material. Screenshot it. Send it. Accept the consequences.

33.

T’Challa’s suit is made of vibranium, which means his fashion sense is truly impenetrable.

34.

Black Panther never loses arguments. He always has the Vibranium-est points.

…Yeah, that one doesn’t work. At all. I tried to force “vibrant” in there and it collapsed like a building in a third-act battle sequence.

35. Guardians of the Galaxy Rapid Fire

• I am Groot-ful for your friendship.
• Rocket Raccoon really knows how to launch an attack.
• Drax’s humor is so dry it’s practically invisible.

The Drax one is my sleeper favorite because it works both as a joke about his personality AND as a reference to his “standing so still he’s invisible” bit. Layers!

36.

Star-Lord’s mixtape is out of this world.

37.

Gamora walked into a paint store and asked for something in green. The clerk said, “We have fifty shades.” She said, “I only need the deadliest one.”

38.

Nebula has a lot of space issues. Daddy issues too, but mostly space ones.

39. For the Deep-Cut Fans

Why did Kang have trouble keeping appointments? He was always running out of time.

Okay but here’s one that’s actually niche: Nathaniel Richards has so many variants that his family tree is less of a tree and more of a tangled timeline. If you know why that’s funny on multiple levels (hi, Ravonna), you’re my people.

40.

The Scarlet Witch’s powers are nothing to hex-pect lightly.

41.

Wanda’s cooking show would be called “Hex Kitchen.” I would watch every episode.

42. Vision Puns (Get It? Because He Can Phase Through Things? Like These Puns Phase Through Quality Control?)

Vision really knows how to phase through a tough situation.

43.

I asked Vision if he was feeling okay. He said he was going through a lot. Literally. Through walls, floors, the occasional building.

44.

Ant-Man’s problems are pretty small.

45. Ant-Man Appreciation Corner

Why is Ant-Man the best party guest? He really knows how to grow on you. Also he’ll fit in any venue regardless of capacity limits, which is honestly the more practical selling point.

46.

Scott Lang’s business cards must be tiny. Hard to magnify his accomplishments.

47.

The Wasp is always buzzing about something.

Low effort. I know. Sometimes you just gotta fill the list, folks.

48. Caption-Ready

“Just a Marvel-ous day to be alive ✨”

Basic? Absolutely. But it works on every single photo you’ll ever post and you know it.

49.

Nick Fury’s secrets have secrets that have Fury-ous trust issues.

50. The Halfway-Past-Halfway Point Obscure One

If you know about the Marvel 1602 universe, then you know that Elizabethan-era Nick Fury was basically running SHIELD with a ruff crowd.

That’s a collar joke. A 17th-century collar joke crossed with a Marvel deep cut. I will accept my award now.

51.

“I told my friend I wanted to be like Captain Marvel.”
“What’d they say?”
“That I was aiming too higher, further, faster.”

52.

Carol Danvers really brings the energy to every fight. Photon energy, specifically, but still.

53.

Falcon’s promotion to Captain America was a real wing-win situation.

54. Niche Alert

Moon Knight has the most phases. Get it? Because moon phases? And also his dissociative identity disorder means he literally has multiple phases of personality? This is either very clever or very insensitive and I genuinely can’t tell anymore. I’m keeping it because Marc, Steven, and Jake would each have a different opinion about it anyway.

55.

Deadpool breaks the fourth wall so much he should really hire a contractor.

56.

Why does Deadpool never win at hide and seek? He can’t stop breaking character. Or walls. Or narrative conventions.

57. The Obscure One That Only Comics People Will Get

Squirrel Girl has beaten Thanos, Doctor Doom, and Galactus, which means her pun potential is un-be-squirrel-ably high and yet nobody ever talks about her. The most underrated character in all of Marvel, and I will nut back down from this position.

Two puns. Both awful. Doreen Green deserves them both.

58.

Shang-Chi really rings in the new era of Marvel.

59.

Ms. Marvel can stretch her abilities to fit any situation. Also her limbs. Mostly her limbs, tbh.

60. The Finale

What did one Avenger say to the other after saving the world again? “Same time next phase?”

61.

Tony Stark’s credit card got declined. Guess he finally ran out of Stark currency.

Wait, that doesn’t even, okay you know what, I said I’d do around 60 marvel puns and I’ve lost count at this point. Some of these are gold, some are vibranium, and some are whatever cheap metal Hawkeye’s arrows are made of.

Anyway, my Endgame was always to make you groan at least once, and if you’ve read this far, I’ve already won.